So it happens again -- What do I do?

It happened again!  My daughter, JoJo's baby shower was at my home and I am surrounded by dear friends and family, some who have driven many miles to attend this big event.  I am enjoying my daughter's surprise and delight at the gifts, when a friend leans over and whispers in my ear, "Where is your camera?" 

My camera is packed away. 
It is resting; getting ready for the big event. 
It is on vacation. 
It doesn't want to attend the baby shower. 

No excuse was sane enough to be spoken aloud.  So I race to my office, grab my equipment and jump into picture-taking mode.

There is no reason for this irresponsible behavior on my part.  It is my daughter's baby shower and, yes, by goodness, she will want pictures to remember it by.  It is as if there are two Janene's -- one wanting to be a by-stander, just enjoying life like everyone else and there is the other, that bossy, type-A photographer who is all about lighting and creating art out of the mundane.

I know it isn't a unique quandary I find myself in. There was a forum recently where professional photographers talked about their "accidental" forgetting of camera equipment when attending events. They felt burdened by family and friends who were always leaning on them for photographic favors.  But I don't think that is the issue here.  I think I'd feel better about this situation if I were a bit more in control of my forgetting.  There is almost a detachment in me from wanting for myself what I market to others as essential for documenting their family history.  Even my husband is starting to nag (yes nag!) me about why my pictures are not on our walls. 

My Mom always said, "Isn't it always the plumber's house that needs plumbing?"

It is all about finding balance.  I don't want to wake up one day and realize that I have missed documenting all the precious milestones in my family's life while I was running around making sure I invested my creativity and energy into making beautiful memories for others.  Maybe the solution is as simple as just needing to set my camera on auto mode and hand it over to a trustworthy friend so I can sit back and enjoy the moment.  Maybe I'd find myself in a frame or two.  I could also save up for a handy point and shoot camera to remove the burden of using professional equipment.

Whatever the solution, I need to invest myself in making a change before I look up one day and realize that in pursuing my passion by building a business, I've failed to enjoy it for myself.

I wrote the above post a couple of weeks ago, but held off publishing it just yet. Here is a sample of the rich life we have had at the Snyder house -- birth of our 2nd grandchild, Ellie Marie Lipp.  She is a pint-sized ray of sunshine!